So…I’ve been hiding something from a lot of people. I haven’t wanted to say anything until it’s all sorted out, but I can’t wait any longer. So here it is:
Eric and I are homeless
There. There it is. It sounds dirty and sad, but really it’s been cool. I mean, it hasn’t been cool, it’s been painful, and stressful, and horrible. But the optimist inside of me says it’s been pretty cool.
I’ll talk about the wedding and honeymoon in another post, but after all of that was over, Eric and I went to an awesome campground for our honeymoon. We stayed in a big cabin for an entire week and were lucky enough to have the campground (mostly) to ourselves. We went hiking, fed some monkeys, and made a fire nearly every night. We drank, we smoked, and we cuddled. It was one of the most relaxing weeks of my life. After Friday, though, our morale began to waiver; we realized that we would have to go back into the real world. More frightening was the reminder that we had nowhere to go in that real world.
Let’s rewind a bit. Back to June-ish 2015. Eric tells me some exciting news that he’s been working on has finally come to fruition. My camping-enthusiast fiance had ordered the park model camper we would be living in for the first few years of our marriage. “It’ll be ready by the second week of September!” he told me with that goofy grin of his spreading across his face
Well, the second week of September came and the camper was ready! Then, the assholes from the camper company got into a wreck with the darned thing on its way to the sales lot that we had to go to pick it up from (a trip from Minnesota or something to New Jersey). They flipped the camper over the guard rail. The driver was fine (though he was still an asshole). So, we were told three more months and it would be re-built and delivered…again. Well, that also happened but the camper got into another accident on its way up. This time, it only suffered some superficial damage that would be fixed upon delivery to the NJ lot. It was finally delivered to Jersey. Eric went to take a look at it, asked when it could be fixed and delivered and they told him three weeks. Three weeks later, we call and there’s no answer.
We proceed to call pretty much every day for that week and still never get an answer. So, Eric calls the NJ state police and meets them up there to get our first home and threaten legal action (mind you, at this point we’re in the months of March and April–we got married in May and needed somewhere to live ASAP). Apparently he wasn’t the only one going to threaten these people with legal action. There were at least three other people there. The police gave the camper people three days to get everything fixed or they would be shut down. Well..they didn’t finish the camper so they were shut down. Unfortunately, Eric had taken out a loan through the company and we wouldn’t be able to take our camper home until we could cough up $45,000. After nearly years of planning to live in a camper rather than an apartment, we had finally found the one and were screwed over.
Because we had nowhere to live, my mom’s house was too small, and his cousin was staying with his parents in his old room, we were literally homeless. So….we asked his parents for some help financially and they bought us a beautiful two-room cabin sized tent. We pitched it up in his parent’s backyard, installed an air conditioner with duct tape and old sheets, peed in a bucket, and slept on an air mattress.
This is the part of the show where my inner optimist shows up. At this point we have a roof over our heads, a cool place to sleep, food, and a means of doing laundry that was free. I wish that inner optimist of mine had compensated for a plan B.
One day, on my way to a job interview, Eric gets a call from his parents. “The owners were just in our backyard and want that tent gone by tomorrow.” Yeah. Suffice it to say, I didn’t make it to my interview and we both cried for the rest of the day while we hurriedly packed up all of our belongings.
Thankfully, some friends of Eric’s offered their spare bedroom to us for basically as long as we need to get back on our feet. We attempted the other day to have Eric’s dad co-sign for a used camper that we instantly fell in love with on a lot closer to home. But that fell through as well. So here we are. Homeless, hungry, broke, but helplessly in love with each other.
The world fades away when we’re together. Nothing about our lives matter when it’s just the two of us. Just yesterday we had $3 in our bank account but had nothing to eat that was hearty enough to be called dinner. So we dumped out our change jar and bought some frozen pizzas with $11 worth of quarters. We ate them in a hot guest room on an air mattress surrounded by the suitcases we’ve had since our honeymoon. But we laughed about how tiny the pizzas were, and we cried about how stressed out we are, and we cuddled because we had no words left.